We all die, thats inevitable. Our journey in life will always have its ending, its up to us how to generate the plot to make it a unique story and leave the ending memorable. However, I also believe that there are life stories that are cut without notice, not that theirs werent interesting, but somehow their deaths made a side story of one's life story.
My brother's life story has ended two years ago, 43 years worth was cut short by body malfunctions - he may have been downed by his physical body but his spirit continue to dwell in our lives. His death was our enemy. Believe me, the pain is undeniably real up to this day. His death became my biggest nightmare, it has largely inoculated to the strangeness of what we call LIFE. Death is difficult whether sudden or not, it will always take out a piece from the equation of being WHOLE. Pieces of you will shatter to bits and there is just no way to put them perfectly together. There is that empty hole always. ALWAYS!
I welcome death, I just hope it comes on my own terms. If it literally steals my breath away while I am peacefully asleep, I am fine with it. If cardiac arrest is so strong, I die upon collapsing, I am fine with it. If death comes when my son has full concept of life and death and knows how to deal with it, Im fine with it. Seriously, I am fine with it if it happens to me. Im not afraid of death, I am only afraid for the people being left behind because I have been there, I am IN there now. Death is such a strong enemy, no way of escaping it however how hard you try, it is REAL!
But death is also a BELIEVER's friend. It is coming home to our creator. It is the final destination where peace finally settles in, It is heaven. Surreal as it may sound, but isnt it where we are all headed? Death is our restoration, our redeeming moment. The only factor that we consider it our enemy is that we who will remain will grieve, but those who will pass on wont.
The nagging question is, how do we know if the soul of our departed has reached its final resting place? Is there a sneak peek for that, or a short trailer? No we dont. How about those lives who has lived a chaotic one and was called by death catchers? Will they ever find their way to heaven? Do they have the chance to amend their ways? I dont have answers to that, do you? We are just left to wonder, but deep inside we are assured they are not at peace, eternally.
I miss my brother, today is his 2nd death anniversary, it seems too long already, Bearing the pain is a struggle, but this is life and we just have to accept it and try to move on. As I have said before, we will never get over it but we just learn how to cope.
As what Beric Dondarrion said in GOT 7: "Life. Death is the enemy. The first enemy and the last."
I guess that says it all... I miss you little brother, always!
