Monday, March 21, 2011

If you can't get EVEN, just be NICE!

Why do people get revenge when being wronged? Is it that hard to forgive and forget? Why is the emotion of a human being so unstable? Why does each one react differently to a given situation? Why does "regret" comes later?

I have initiated among my friends the act of giving each one a "feel-good" letter. I have given letters to few of my closest friends and it felt good knowing I was able to pinpoint their strengths. Having given them assurance that they have something good in their hearts made them happy, and that was my intention. I have my demons too, yet I have tried hard to be there to these people when they needed me most and I reiterated that on the letters I wrote to them, eventhough some of these people or most of them done me wrong (some just even recently), i just had to look the better side of their character....and there was only one conclusion in mind, I did forgive and moved on....

I treasure my friends so much...I have always been around them and I couldnt even imagine myself letting anyone of them disappear from my life...but there comes a time in your life that you get hurt so much that you just want to alienate yourself because you cant endure the pain anymore...but not necessarily getting revenge just to make them feel the hurt that they have inflicted on you in the first place. I dont believe in the word "revenge"..it is too hateful and too heavy in the heart...what I do is just stay away....until such time I go numb and that person does not affect me anymore...but the process is quite exhilarating, as I am also wishing to understand the person while nursing the pain..

A friend once told me that he cant let anyone cross him...and if someone does, he will make sure the pain inflicted will be more than what he received. I shot back by saying that it shouldnt be the way it is...he should be more forgiving and instead try to understand where the person is coming from...but his mind is closed on that one...that time while talking to him, I had this terrible feeling that this man is quite lost...and seriously, I was really scared....Scared because I realized then that this person has so much hatred in his system, and scared that he has a very shallow definition of having "friends" or relationships for that matter. It got me to thinking, how far could you go for a friend? How patient should you be and how forgiving should one become? Are friends your friends just for the good times? Cant anyone be accepted at his worst? So if you get revenge, dont you regret hurting that person by just doing the act? What is the right definition of a friendship then? Will the relationship be still the same? How do you categorize your friends? Are there friends just for company? Are friends seasonal, really? Seriously?

What am I to my friends? How do they see me as a person and as a friend? Did I pass their standards to deserve the title and be called a "TRUE" friend? Should I really care what they say, does it really matter?

I dont know the answers to these questions, but what I know is I dont call anyone a friend unless they know me, my life, my thoughts....because for me, what is the use of having so many friends but not anyone even know you inside? I want my so-called friends to be a witness of my LIFE and celebrate it with me...if they dont know who "JUBANG" really is, then they are just acquiantances...and yes, I dont get revenge...I just try to be NICE..thats how I am as "FRIEND"!!!

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